In this exercise, you will need to look inward. It is not intuitive to do this. We want to look outward because we think our partner is the source of our pain. Our default position is to spin things, so it’s not our ‘fault.’ In so doing, we avoid looking at ourselves and miss opportunities to know and heal ourselves and our pain. We also never learn to express ourselves honestly, cleanly, and transparently to our partners. So, it’s time now to look at yourself only, to get clear about what you want, and to express it clearly so you can grow towards the kind of relationship partner you want.